Ups and Downs

This week has been all about ups and downs. I've been overly cranky a couple days, and on a high other days.

I started making a lot of changes around Christmas time. It started with downloading Noom, the app that's always advertised on social media for being a "different way to lose weight." They try to help you lose weight by addressing the psychology behind bad eating habits. I was far from convinced that this would help me lose weight. I was already fairly convinced that I haven't been able to lose the baby weight I gained with Jules because of hormone issues. But it was advertised as half off and I thought I would see what it was all about because I wanted to make a change.

After the week of free trial was up, I was unconvinced, so I tried to cancel my upcoming subscription. They were like the cable company and decided to give me three months for free to keep from from giving up on them altogether.

So I kept with it. It ended up being very motivating actually. And I've been able to stick with my intermittent fasting and I mostly stay within my calorie limit every day. Then two weeks ago, I started doing a weightlifting workout 4 days a week. I haven't exercised in at least a year and before that, it wasn't since before I was pregnant with Harrison. Exercise has been shown to be better for your mental health than anti-depressants, so I think that's definitely been helping me have really good days in the last week.

Then about 10 days ago, I started a "program" called The Artist's Way. It's a book I've heard a lot about that outlines 12 weeks worth of thought-changing activities to help you nurture your inner creative. I really like that she talks about being creative as aligning ourselves with our Creator. It has you basically stream of consciousness journal 3 pages worth every morning. Which has forced me to be more aware of my sleep and bed times so that I can be awake early enough to finish those before my day goes crazy. Which it does. Every day except Saturday and Sunday. And occasionally those days are crazy too. :)

But, because I've been doing these things, I think I've been happier, and healthier, and more capable of giving back to my family. I've been noticing the small things that bring me joy more, too.

The clouds the other day were gorgeous cumulo-stratus, with just enough break to let the sunshine through. "The Mountain" was beautiful driving to get kids from school the other day. My kids laughing and playing around together before dinner one evening. Mira touting how good she is at fishing in Stardew Valley. The warmth of a wheat bag on a day when I just can't seem to get warm.

Here's a snippet from my journaling Wednesday:

"I felt so strong yesterday, so capable. I accomplished a buttload of stuff. I took two naps! Two! I got Emilia to seminary, Mira to school, Cecily and cousins to school, did a workout, washed my hair, got Jules and Harrison ready, got Panda Express for them and Em and brought hers to her at school, took Jules to school, to my first nap in the van in the preschool parking lot while Harrison watched on my phone, took Harrison to the library, finished up the assignments for the week from Artist's Way, picked up Jules, made Cecily practice flute and typing, wrote 300 words for my book, took nap #2, picked up Em from play practice, made waffles for dinner, listened to scriptures as a family, straightened downstairs, vacuumed out the van, wrote letters to 2 of Em's friends, and lastly, watched an episode of Covert Affairs while I emptied the dishwasher, finished the dishes, and wiped the counters. I was a frickin' domestic superhero."

Then later on Wednesday, I didn't exercise, Harrison had a major breakdown because he was tired when we were shopping at Walmart, but Wallyworld didn't have the ONE ingredient I needed for dinner, so we had to go to another grocery store and we had to hurry so we wouldn't be late picking up Jules, but Harrison remembered that 2 1/2 months ago, we went one time to this same grocery store and I bought him a matchbox car there, but they weren't in the same spot and I'd already bought him a Spiderman shirt at Walmart, so I wasn't going to buy him one even if we could find them, so he started screaming and going boneless, so I had to surfboard carry him to the car with the ONE ingredient in the other hand. He screamed bloody murder all the way to pick up Jules and the entire 25 minute drive back to our house. And then when we got there, I realized that we'd actually needed TWO ingredients for dinner, but I didn't realize we were almost out of the one. I ate too much junk food that day.

The universe has a way of balancing out, don't you think? 😂

There was also a Harrison incident that I forgot about when I was chronicling his craziness last week.

One day, Jules came running to me saying Harrison was putting crayons into the holes of Daddy's computer. I rolled my eyes. Because of course Harrison would figure out that crayons were just the right size to fit through those holes. I told him to stop and put the crayons up where he couldn't reach them, but I was running out the door to pick someone up from school, so I didn't do anything about it right then. I later remembered and told Steve about it, but I don't think either of us realized just how many crayons he had stuck in there. A couple days later, Steve's monitor wouldn't turn on and he opened it up. There were like a hundred crayons in the computer, and because we hadn't taken them out right away, they had melted to Steve's video card. We should have known better than to underestimate the little man. That cost us a new video card. You know, just a few hundred dollars down the drain. 

The other morning though, I came home from dropping Em off at school and Harrison had woken up during the 10 minutes I was gone. He ran over to me and wrapped his arms around my legs like he hadn't seen me in a year and said, "Mom! Mommy! I loooove you!"

To end the week, Cecily had a piano recital and Steve tried to start the house on fire by making french fries to have with our dinner with the Nelsons. The fire alarm in this house is ridiculously sensitive and LOUD. Goodness.

This is a random picture that I don't think I got in last week. The week after Christmas one night, Mira and Cecily and Kate were invited to the house of another family in the ward to watch the Eras Tour movie. They all had a lot of fun even though we're not necessarily "Swifties" at our house. :)